The Dread of Returning to “Normal” Life as an HSP
This past year has been difficult beyond belief, but the one silver lining for many Highly Sensitive folks was that it was finally socially acceptable to stay home more often. Obviously not under these conditions, but it was something that most of us had dreamed of for so long. For the first time, there was a break from the constant pressure to socialize, stressful family dynamics, crowded commutes, or overstimulating work environments.
A year later, with vaccinations in full swing and places opening back up in some areas, Sensitive folks are getting worried about the increasing pressure to return to the previous “normal”. A normal that wasn’t designed by or for the 20% of us that are more perceptive and therefore easily overstimulated.
Also, with a brain that is wired to pause before acting, you can imagine the high stakes of jumping back in after a pandemic! If you are feeling cautious, nervous, or downright scared of what could happen if life opens back up too quickly, you’re definitely not alone.
The Pressure to Return to Normal
The potential assault on your nervous system is real. Going from being at home all the time to suddenly thrust back into social gatherings and noisy environments is going to be quite the shock! When I reached out to my HSP Instagram community, 81% said they are feeling pressured to return to “normal” as well as:
Dread about returning to noisy offices
Worry about being overwhelmed by crowds
Not ready to leave the comfort of home
Disheartened by people acting as if the pandemic is over
Nervous and anxious
Guilt over not wanting to see old friends
The past year may have provided you with a lot of space to think on what wasn’t working for you before. Maybe you now realize you don’t want to be as available, need stronger boundaries with certain people, want to structure your work life differently, or feel called to be more involved in social activism. What insights have bubbled up for you?
Take Time + Space to Transition
Wherever you are in your process, just know that you’re going to need more time and space to transition to what comes next - whether that’s returning to your old “normal” or restructuring your life completely. As I mentioned above, HSPs are wired to pause and reflect, to ease in slowly, to do things once and do them right (As Dr. Aron would say). Remember that it’s okay to go at your own pace and hold boundaries around how much you want or feel comfortable to socialize.
As you do dip your toe back into the outside world, go slow. When meeting in person, start with a short amount of time to manage stimulation levels, and make sure you have some decompression time immediately after or the next day off. It can also be important to limit how many social gatherings you commit to - perhaps you want to start with one per month or one per week, depending on your needs. It’s easier to increase social engagements as you go rather than to have to cancel plans last minute or make an awkward exit in the middle of a party (been there!).
Honor Your Sensitive Needs
No matter how you’re feeling about the upcoming transition out of quarantine life back into “normal” life, take time to check in with yourself. What do you need and want to feel safe? How can you feel best supported? Are there any new practices or habits that you want to bring with you into post-pandemic life? This transition could be a great opportunity to redefine your social life, your boundaries, your self-care, or anything else that needs a reset. Just take it slow and honor your unique needs along the way.
